The dream started with Kasia and I in someone's apartment. It was late at night and we were with two other guys, one of whom Kasia was getting very flirty with. As we all lay down for bed I could hear the two of them rustling around and as I lifted up their blanket I could see his fingers slowly sliding in and out of her pussy. I scrambled to get my iphone out and switch to the camera setting but of course I couldn't get it to work fast enough, and by the time I was ready he had already gotten up to leave. She gave me that satiated "Whoa, that was crazy!" look and I was so shocked that she had done it and yet completely turned on by the experience.

In the next dream Kasia and I were homeless and we had broken into a small store that was a few steps down from the street level. As we slept on a bench I tried to calculate how long we could sleep before we would be in danger of someone coming to open the store and discovering us. Eventually we got into my car (which I do not own) and as I drove we were listening to David Lee Roth. I could hear a mother with her small child in the backseat and she kept making strange comments like "This song must be a new song because it definitely isn't OLD!" and it occurred to me that she was trying to shelter this child from ever knowing that there was life before the 90's (even though the child was much too young to comprehend this anyways).

I was out in the city with Kasia and got a call from our neighbor asking if I could come over and help him set up his new hamster cage. It sounded a bit bizarre but I went there anyways, and when I arrived he took me into an apartment that we apparently had rented out as a meth lab (obviously thinking about Breaking Bad). All across one half of the ceiling and down one of the walls was filled with embedded sparkling diamonds and I knew that whoever was cooking the latest batch of meth had made a mistake causing the batch to explode. Without hesitation I dragged a table beneath the damaged area and we jumped up and started removing the evidence as quickly as we could.

In the next dream I was in a boat offshore with Jay-Z and he was giving me a blowjob. I was obviously not enjoying it so we rowed back to shore. There was a high building overlooking the water, and I entered it as if I had been there a hundred times. I went upstairs and hung out with his bodyguard and he was saying that Jay-Z wasn't "performing" well because he knew the bodyguard was watching us. I laughed and said "Ironically I need someone watching us in order to cum and he's just the opposite."

In the first dream I was getting ready for work and everything that could go wrong was doing just that. It was almost 5:00pm and I knew I was supposed to be at work by 3:00pm but as much as I tried to call my boss the phone just wouldn't work or I couldn't find his number. When I finally got to work I couldn't figure out my locker combination which meant I couldn't get my outfit, and there were two large carpet cleaning machines chained up next to my locker and I knew it was my job to unlock them but again the combinations just would not work. Plus, they were full of water and as I shook them to try getting them free from the chains the water was spilling out all over the floor and I knew I'd have to mop it up even though I was already hours late.

Next, I was hanging out in a filthy bathroom with Kasia and my old friend Melissa C. (she was Kasia's childhood friend in this dream) and somehow it was decided that if I stayed in the bathroom and cleaned they would go out into the living room to have their first lesbian experience.

I was picking up trash and there was hair everywhere as if someone took a hot shower and then trimmed their dry hair with a fan on. I did a quick sweep and then snuck around the corner to see if they were really going through with it. The first thing I saw was Kasia sucking Mel's cock and I remember thinking "Oh yeah, I forgot she had a dick! Even better!" I couldn't wait to watch her get fucked by it.

Something happened outside of the apartment which made them stop and as soon as they noticed me there they just laughed and came to their senses which meant there would be no more show. Kasia mentioned how the camera had jammed up after a few pics and I just hoped that the pics were of Mel so I could see her naked.

I was having a really bad day in this dream....I was at home looking at porn in my sister Erin's bedroom when suddenly she comes in and says "Hey what are you looking at?" and I had to shut the computer off before she could see.

Next, I noticed that the password for my "Words For Free" account (it's actually the scrabble app on my iphone) had been hacked by my boss Thomas's girlfriend and I was so upset about it. She had used the account to send me an email asking my opinion about the Beatles Broadway show called 'Rain' so I approached Thomas to ask him about it. Apparently she had been planning to take Thomas as a surprise and now I had ruined it by telling him.

When I saw Thomas at work later he knew I was having a bad day. There were about 10 girls behind a bar and most of them had their shirts off. Cassaundra was one of them but she kept her shirt on because you could tell she was uncomfortable being nude in public. My sister Erin was there and she started rubbed some strange soothing lotion on my forehead to calm me down.

The next morning I was taking the 2 train to work and I accidentally got off at the wrong stop. As I waited on the platform I found myself in the dark fending myself from two large raccoons which I kept kicking onto hte train tracks. They kept jumping back up onto the platform and luckily I was able to find a pitchfork but by then my friends were there helping me look for them.

We all got back onto the train and took it all the way down to Coney Island just in time for the sunrise and I was upset that I forgot my camera.