The dream started with Kasia and I in someone's apartment. It was late at night and we were with two other guys, one of whom Kasia was getting very flirty with. As we all lay down for bed I could hear the two of them rustling around and as I lifted up their blanket I could see his fingers slowly sliding in and out of her pussy. I scrambled to get my iphone out and switch to the camera setting but of course I couldn't get it to work fast enough, and by the time I was ready he had already gotten up to leave. She gave me that satiated "Whoa, that was crazy!" look and I was so shocked that she had done it and yet completely turned on by the experience.

In the next dream Kasia and I were homeless and we had broken into a small store that was a few steps down from the street level. As we slept on a bench I tried to calculate how long we could sleep before we would be in danger of someone coming to open the store and discovering us. Eventually we got into my car (which I do not own) and as I drove we were listening to David Lee Roth. I could hear a mother with her small child in the backseat and she kept making strange comments like "This song must be a new song because it definitely isn't OLD!" and it occurred to me that she was trying to shelter this child from ever knowing that there was life before the 90's (even though the child was much too young to comprehend this anyways).

I was out in the city with Kasia and got a call from our neighbor asking if I could come over and help him set up his new hamster cage. It sounded a bit bizarre but I went there anyways, and when I arrived he took me into an apartment that we apparently had rented out as a meth lab (obviously thinking about Breaking Bad). All across one half of the ceiling and down one of the walls was filled with embedded sparkling diamonds and I knew that whoever was cooking the latest batch of meth had made a mistake causing the batch to explode. Without hesitation I dragged a table beneath the damaged area and we jumped up and started removing the evidence as quickly as we could.

In the next dream I was in a boat offshore with Jay-Z and he was giving me a blowjob. I was obviously not enjoying it so we rowed back to shore. There was a high building overlooking the water, and I entered it as if I had been there a hundred times. I went upstairs and hung out with his bodyguard and he was saying that Jay-Z wasn't "performing" well because he knew the bodyguard was watching us. I laughed and said "Ironically I need someone watching us in order to cum and he's just the opposite."

In the first dream I was getting ready for work and everything that could go wrong was doing just that. It was almost 5:00pm and I knew I was supposed to be at work by 3:00pm but as much as I tried to call my boss the phone just wouldn't work or I couldn't find his number. When I finally got to work I couldn't figure out my locker combination which meant I couldn't get my outfit, and there were two large carpet cleaning machines chained up next to my locker and I knew it was my job to unlock them but again the combinations just would not work. Plus, they were full of water and as I shook them to try getting them free from the chains the water was spilling out all over the floor and I knew I'd have to mop it up even though I was already hours late.

Next, I was hanging out in a filthy bathroom with Kasia and my old friend Melissa C. (she was Kasia's childhood friend in this dream) and somehow it was decided that if I stayed in the bathroom and cleaned they would go out into the living room to have their first lesbian experience.

I was picking up trash and there was hair everywhere as if someone took a hot shower and then trimmed their dry hair with a fan on. I did a quick sweep and then snuck around the corner to see if they were really going through with it. The first thing I saw was Kasia sucking Mel's cock and I remember thinking "Oh yeah, I forgot she had a dick! Even better!" I couldn't wait to watch her get fucked by it.

Something happened outside of the apartment which made them stop and as soon as they noticed me there they just laughed and came to their senses which meant there would be no more show. Kasia mentioned how the camera had jammed up after a few pics and I just hoped that the pics were of Mel so I could see her naked.

I was having a really bad day in this dream....I was at home looking at porn in my sister Erin's bedroom when suddenly she comes in and says "Hey what are you looking at?" and I had to shut the computer off before she could see.

Next, I noticed that the password for my "Words For Free" account (it's actually the scrabble app on my iphone) had been hacked by my boss Thomas's girlfriend and I was so upset about it. She had used the account to send me an email asking my opinion about the Beatles Broadway show called 'Rain' so I approached Thomas to ask him about it. Apparently she had been planning to take Thomas as a surprise and now I had ruined it by telling him.

When I saw Thomas at work later he knew I was having a bad day. There were about 10 girls behind a bar and most of them had their shirts off. Cassaundra was one of them but she kept her shirt on because you could tell she was uncomfortable being nude in public. My sister Erin was there and she started rubbed some strange soothing lotion on my forehead to calm me down.

The next morning I was taking the 2 train to work and I accidentally got off at the wrong stop. As I waited on the platform I found myself in the dark fending myself from two large raccoons which I kept kicking onto hte train tracks. They kept jumping back up onto the platform and luckily I was able to find a pitchfork but by then my friends were there helping me look for them.

We all got back onto the train and took it all the way down to Coney Island just in time for the sunrise and I was upset that I forgot my camera.

It started with me meeting up with my Improv group outside somewhere and as we left we realized that something major had just happened in the city and we would have to band together to help each other out.
Eventually we ended up at someone’s house and I was in the basement showing Peter and someone else from class my cabinets that I made for Roman. I was afraid he'd be jealous or upset that I didn't make anything for him.
Later I was upstairs hanging out with Katie and as she went into the bathroom to change her clothes I watched her take off her dress. She had a blue bra and tiny blue thongs on that made her ass look long and bubbly and I stared at it as long as I could before walking away to give her some privacy.

My friend Dave G. and I had parked our bikes outside of a small gas station and I quickly went in to purchase a pack of cigarettes without letting Dave know. They only had 3 different kinds so I had to choose between Marlborough and Benson & Hedges (which is what I used to smoke). They also had an entire wall of snow-cone machines but I had taken so long picking out smokes that I let the girl behind me get her snow cone while I decided on which flavor to get. By the time it was my turn Dave came in wondering what was taking me so long. As I picked a flavor that I had never heard of I could hear Dave speaking a few lines of Polish to the girl and I wondered where he had learned Polish from.

Next, Kasia and I were walking our bikes and she was talking about getting a dog. For some reason I knew we already had some kids so I said “Yes” because I thought "Well it's already too much to handle so what's a dog going to hurt?" I was already stressed.

Next I was in the bedroom and I noticed a group of flies had gathered on his big glass jar on the dresser. I started swatting at them with a flyswatter and Kasia got upset that I wasn't being more careful. I assured her that the jar was much too heavy to be knocked over and continued to swat away. Eventually the room was infested with hundreds of bees and wasps which we ran around swatting and stomping on and spraying with Raid until there was just a mess of dead insects all around. Moments later the room was filled with thousands of worms, which we decided was a naturally occurring repercussion of killing so many insects at once.

Kasia and I had just moved into a new apartment and as we were unpacking and getting situated the doorbell rang and our two new kittens were delivered.

That evening we found ourselves in the living room with a bunch of random strangers and couples. The lead guy was welcoming all of us and after giving a short speech he proceeded to show all of us around the house. His entire language was sprinkled with religious comments and eventually it occurred to me that we had moved into a religious commune. I was so upset and disappointed that we didn't research it more before we moved in. Now we would have to pack everything back up and even worse is that the kittens would have to readjust to a new home.

In the first dream I was setting up dominoes with someone in a huge bedroom while my co-worker Jen E. and my friend Heather from Austin were busy doing something else. When we were halfway done (which took hours) I gave up and hit one of the dominoes and we watched them crackle and fall as the cat jumped around them in disbelief.

Afterwards were were sitting around talking and Jen decided to change shirts. No one seemed to notice as she removed her bra and lifted the tops of her small breasts to get a closer check of her cute puffy nipples, and when she turned and noticed I was staring she just laughed and said "What am I doing sitting here with my shirt off?" I was the only one paying attention.

Next I was talking to Kasia in the doorway of her apartment, when suddenly I noticed a strange gray animal resembling a rabbit moving along the floor of the huge foyer. Kasia picked it up only to discover that it was mechanical so we let it run around the foyer hoping to freak out the stray cat that was running around as well.

I woke up before it could happen.

I had woken up at my parents house in the middle of the night and I had gone downstairs to find the living room lit up like a disco. Peering outside the window I could see the streets lined with police cars, and it was apparent that someone or something was on the loose and they were hoping to catch it. I went outside and noticed a figure digging around in the garage, and before I could freak out I realized it was just my boyfriend getting his bike. Apparently we just had a fight and he was taking this opportunity to leave. I followed him down the driveway and as he left he mentioned that they still hadn't fixed the chimney and I turned to find my parents chimney in broken down disarray.

In the next dream I was sitting in the back of a van next to my dad. We were on our way up to the cottage (which I was really excited about) and he was reading a book. I was peering over his shoulder trying to read it as well since there was nothing else to read and he offered to give it to me but I refused. In my head I remember thinking "See, this is why I could never be a parent- you have to be so selfless and willing to give up everything and I don't think I could do it." I also noticed that I had a slight erection and I felt
incredibly awkward. I  repositioned myself to ensure he didn't notice.

Along the way we stopped at my Uncle Bill's house (where we were told tornadoes had torn through his neighborhood the night before) and as we exited the car he greeted us with his newest invention- it was
called "bird poop soap" and he smirkingly made sure we all got a dollop before we entered the house. With each squirt of white lotion there was a small crusty portion of black and we all laughed so hard at the brilliance of it. I mentioned how happy I was that my own poop wasn't like that and he made sure to mention that his stool always had black crust on it.

The last thing I recall before waking up is playing with his tiny hairless dog which he was so proud of. Even more proud than his soap which I clearly had to disagree with.

Kasia and I were staying at someone's house and I was going to run out and get some food. As I got outside a woman with a dog had stopped by and was telling the owner of the house that she had received a lot of
complaints about their dog barking. It started pouring out and I started to look for my umbrella and then decided that I would stay in.

Next Kasia and I walked down the street to see a movie. When we got to the ticket window there were two guys about to buy some tickets. The show we wanted to see was either sold out or not playing at the time
and we were just debating on what to see when another group came up to us and handed us a ticket for Black Swan that they weren't going to use. As I reached for it the asshole in front of me jumped in front of me and grabbed it. I was so pissed and I grabbed a padlock and started smashing it into his face repeatedly. He just kept laughing until eventually he went down.

I was then with my old friend Floyd and as we ran around the corner I looked over my shoulder and saw a cop pulling up to the theater. We hid out in someone's apt and eventually Floyd left and the apt owners
friend came by. Kasia and I started packing our stuff (we were staying there so all of our clothes towels etc were there) and I was so nervous. Then our friend Jen Blanchard came home and we realized we were okay. There were three different bedrooms and as I walked through the house collecting our things I noticed there were girls changing out of their clothes in each different room. I peeked but acted like I wasn't looking. When we were about to leave I wondered if we would be able to get to the car with all our stuff (the car was still by the theatre) and get home without the cops finding me.